NLDLine

The Plight of Living With a Learning Disability
By Lori Attardi

    Through this article I hope to educate people about the plight of persons living with Nonverbal Learning Disorder and other learning disabilities. Only through education, can society render changes in the attitudes and treatment of the learning disabled. If my article touches, even a few people, then I have succeeded in paving the way and making a difference in the lives of persons living with NLD and other learning disorders. Here, then, is my story...
    The year was 1972. I was a young child who could always be found sitting in the closet, reading my books for hours on end. In kindergarden my favorite period was when the class would sit in a circle, write on mini chalkboards and take turns reading from books. All through elementary school, there were numerous times when my peers would comment that I was a very fast reader. In later childhood years, I became an avid journal writer and began creating news stories just for fun. Then there were Mathematics, Social Activities and activities requiring fine motor skills. At these times, the clouds moved in and the rain poured on my life. Simple mathematical operations were extremely arduous for me, and I was lost in class. I lacked social skills, was often ridiculed and tormented by my peers and spent my days planning how to escape the taunts and torments my peers invoked on me. I avoided group sports and other motor skill activities like the plague, for I lacked the physical coordination to compel my limbs to do what my intellect knew was to be done. Over the years, I was continuously passed over in P.E. class when picking team members. When all were picked and I remained standing solo, the team that had no choice but to take me showed their disdain with words of doom and disgust.
    In 1981 I began Junior high. I continued to excel in reading and writing skills, my peers continued to comment on my fast in class reading rate, I continued writing journals and writing news and magazine articles for fun. My skills of reading, writing, vocabulary, spelling and math were tested. In all areas, except math, I came in at the 10th grade level. My math skills were at the 3rd grade level. My peers became even more ruthless towards me. I was now at a very tough school and can remember being spit in the face and kicked from behind for no other reason than walking to closely to someone who did not want me near them. One day, a fellow school mate came up to me and punched me in the head so hard, that I immediately felt dizzy and saw the world spinning around me. I was released from school one week earlier then everyone else that year because the counselor heard about plans to gang up on me on the last day of school and he thought I might really be killed. In classes like shop, economics and science, I could read the instructions and memorize them, but when I went to put the steps into action I couldn't seem to connect what I knew needed to be done to actually putting them into practice. Thus, I was not allowed to take classes such as biology or chemistry.
    High school began at the end of 1982. I became interested in the career of a Journalist. I would spend hours of my leisure time studying various writing styles and writing numerous essays, reports and articles, then send them out to see if I could get published. The editor of Seventeen magazine wrote me back and commented on an article I had sent them. She reinforced what was good about my article and what needed improvement. Though I did not get published, she did write that I had the makings of a good writer and to continue trying and writing. In my senior year, I wrote for the school newspaper. One of my articles was voted the best article in the school newspaper of the the whole year. I passed the reading and writing competency tests with high scores the first time I took them during my freshman year. It would take four years, including summers, and lots of late night studying to finally pass the math competency test in my senior year. I also became very physically active. I would bike ride 20 miles a day, run 7-10 miles and perform 2 hours of aerobic dance. Still, in spite of my excellent physical shape, I could not match the skill level of my peers in sports and found myself always coming in last in cross country and track races.
    I graduated from high school in June 1986 and went on to college. I planned to train for the career of Journalist. However, the disabled students program at the school played down my abilities and encouraged me to give up my dreams and quit school. Eventually, I was so broken down from critsism over the years, that I gave up and quit. From college, I entered the working world. Each job I started, from retail, to fast food, to gardening, fired me a few weeks into the job. They would all tell me that I was too slow, they needed someone who could learn and move faster. Over the years, I managed to work at a pet store for one year, a bank for five years and a local animal shelter for one year. Each of these places told me I was too slow and would prevent me from advancing. I was kept in entry level positions while other people advanced the career ladder.
    In 1997 I went back to school. I have been a full time student for the past two years. I worked extremely hard, made it through Elementary Algebra and now have my A.A. degree. For a while I was majoring in Veterinary Technology. But I soon found out that the motor skill dificulties that plagued my childhood followed me to adulthood. I would memorize and be able to recite word for word the steps to tasks such as drawing bood, restraining for procedures and taking radiographic pictures. However, I lacked coordination, fumbled a lot and was unable to apply what I had memorized. I finally realized that I would be happier and more successful if I majored in an area that used my known skills. I now am majoring in Sociology/Gerontology, have plans for writing and becoming published and I would like to write a book.
    In retrospect, I feel that school instructors of the past and other adults did not do me justice. The system failed to protect me from the abuse and torment I endured by my peers and failed to give me the tutoring and support I required in order to excel. I believe that a definite change needs to occur in the attitudes of people regarding those with learning dificulties. School authorities need to protect youngsters being tormented by other children instead of turning their heads in disbelief. Programs need to be actively pursued that will enable disabled students to succeed, not just drift aimlessly through grades. Also, I believe employers should think twice the next time an employee does not progress as fast as other employees. Find out, does this person have a learning disability? Are there accomodations that will enable this person to reach his/her potential? Do not just assume that this person is lazy or is not working hard enough. Sometimes, provided with the right accommodations, a person with a learning disability can make a hard working and faithful employee.
    It is my contention that, it is a terrible tragedy and waste when intelligent minds of learning disabled people are suppressed, and prevented by society from reaching their potential.